This may differ for people, so most importantly, be kind and compassionate.
Things to say:
If you want to share…
I’d love to hear an update.
How are you really doing? How are you feeling physically/ mentally/ emotionally/ spiritually?
How are you doing with the medication?
When is your next appointment?
What can I specifically pray for?
What does that mean?
How is this affecting your life?
Tell me about your diagnosis or treatments.
Text me if you have a prayer request or update.
You schedule a time to talk.
How can I help?
— I’m not one to ask for help especially when this is ongoing, so if I do ask, it took a lot. If you want to ask to help, it might be better just to say, “I really want to bring dinner. Is Thursday ok? I’d love to get coffee with you. Are you free ___?” You planning with emphasis on you enjoying the friendship is better. Mostly because I’m insecure and I don’t want to bother you and your family plans.